Monday, 24 January 2011

Tuesday 25th January 2011


I have a few pairs of shoes, probably too many for a bloke.
I have a blue pair and a silver pair, but someone suggested to me that I should try a blue and silver pair.
It was Skoob that suggested it, Skoob; the bloke off, currently 7th on the top table.
If I get shoes like this then I'm blaming Skoob.
The blue shoes are pretty cool, the sort of shoes you can wear anywhere. Shopping, the beach, skiing, you name it and you can wear them there.
The silver ones are a bit more tricky. I've worn them once and the silver has come off the toes where I knelt down. I think I'll have to get some silver paint to give em a touch up.

I had to do a test today. It was a CSCS test. For those of you who don't know a CSCS test is a 'Construction Skills Certification Scheme' test which you have to pay £17.50 for in order to qualify for a CSCS card, which will cost you a further £30.
The idea is to make construction sites a safer place to be, which is right I suppose, but some of the questions were a little scary.
"You have to work in a confined space, in order to make sure the air is breathable do you: (a) go into the confined space to see if you can breath, (b) light a match and see if it stays lit, (c) use an air meter to check the air, or (d) hold your breath for as long as possible whilst working?"
Some of the questions really make you think that if people got them wrong they shouldn't be allowed to live, let alone work on a construction site.
Fortunately, I passed. I was worried I was going to fail, the embarrassment would have been too much to bear.

I have had some negative comments about my new background and layout. Upset me really, but I suppose I had better change it if no one but me likes it. It's not all about me, I suppose.
Hang on a mo, it is all about me, it's my fucking blog and I should really do as I wish. As is my wont.
But I won't, I will probably change it. At some point.

Andy Gray, what a twat.
Some people are saying "Does this mean we are not allowed to talk about anything when we are at work anymore, in case we say something someone doesn't like?" Well yes, if you work for a global media company earning hundreds of thousands of pounds (probably) and are miked up. YES YOU DO HAVE TO WATCH WHAT YOU SAY YOU FUCKING RETARD!!!!Serves him right, that's my honest opinion, the prick.
Did you know Richard Keys is such a hairy bastard that he has to shave twice a day? He must be a more direct descendant to the apes than the rest of us.

Thinking of a new career. Might go into the Black Pudding market. I know a bloke who has a load of puddings, all different types, that he said he would sell me on the cheap. Could make a fortune on the black market.
Are you allowed to say that anymore? I bet Andy Gray couldn't.
Or Big Ron. He was a bit of a twat too, wasn't he.
Gordon Brown as well. You would think they would learn. Is it a copycat thing? He can get away with it so I'll have a go.
And have any women done it?
If you know of any, let me know.

In the word's of Peter Murphy: Bela Lugosi's dead.............


  1. Cheers for the plug Steve. Blue and silver, with stars. Next big thing. Trust me. Women being sexist? You ever seen that 'Loose Women' thing on daytime telly? Shameful! PS - was the answer to the CSCS question: Hold your breath? Skoob.

  2. Steve, yes you are right, it is your blog but you do not have to read it - your readers do and those squares sent me running straight to the opticians. Yes women can and do make sexist comments but when they do,the man is normally pleased he has been noticed :-) Your stalker.

  3. Dear Skoob, the answer to the question, I think, was not actually in the available answers. The real answer was; get someone less important than yourself to do the work.......

  4. Dear Anon, I hope the background is now more to yours and my many legions of fans liking.
    If not, may I please suggest you squint whilst reading, of use a lower wattage candle.............