We're in Wetherspoons, slumming it again but hey; the beer is cheap, and I had to climb the many stairs to go to the little boy's room.
It ain't that little and men use it, but that's not the point.
There was a bloke in there standing at one of the stones having a wee and sending a text on his mobile phone.
What a cunt.
But what is worse is that he had a very old flip phone, one of those with a tiny little screen and only a numerical key pad so you have to press each button multiple times to get the letter you want.
All I could hear was beep beep beep beep as he pressed the keypad.
So matey, you a a proper cunt, and I'll explain why.
You're a cunt for using your phone whilst having a piss.
You're a cunt for using your phone while I'm having a piss.
You're a cunt for having a phone that is from the Ark.
You're a cunt for leaving the keypad tones on and making all those beeping noises.
All in all, you're a proper cunt...............
Sent from my BlackBerry 10 smartphone.