Saturday 14th February 2015

‎Do you know what I hate, what really fucking annoys me?

Quite a lot really, but I'm talking about something in particular. 

People who walk on the right when the signs say "Keep Left" and people who stand on the left side of an escalator. 

I'm primarily talking about train and tube stations I suppose, and obviously the tube stations are in London but the train stations are everywhere, and in particular in-between the tube stations at places like Bank, Kings Cross etc, where you need to keep left for a reason. 

To stop all the fucking idiots rushing around everywhere and colliding into each other. 

I often travel from East London to Doncaster on a Wednesday afternoon. 

For those of you who have never left your village, or even your street, then stop reading now cause there will be all sorts of words you don't really understand, like train and tube and DLR. 

The Docklands Light Railway, for those who don't know, is a very slow moving roller coaster that goes round the east of London without drivers. Or maybe midget drivers, as once reported on www.thespoof.co.uk

Anyhoo, I go from East India, which is a DLR station not part of a fuck off great big country, ‎to Bank, which is a large, multi-platform station where you can travel on many underground lines as well as the DLR and not somewhere to deposit or withdraw money. 

Fuck me longways people, keep up, do I have to explain everything?

From now on, if you don't understand something the Google the fucker. 

Bank, as I just said, is a large station and you have to walk about a bit to get from platform to platform. 

You have to use escalators. 

Many many other people are doing the same thing. 

I then catch the Northern line to King's Cross which also involves a bit of a walk about‎ and more escalating. 

I don't have a lot of time to do all this and have to (a) walk quickly and (b) walk up and down the escalators. 

So my fucking point is, keep to the bastard left whilst walking around the corridors and stand on the bastard right on the escalator to allow people to walk up the left.

Sent from my BlackBerry 10 smartphone.