Monday, 23 August 2010

Monday 23rd August 2010

Dragon's Den.
Wouldn't it be more fun if they used real dragons?
Ones that actually breathed fire.
If they got numpties in front of them, numpties that were really stupid, then they would simply incinerate them.
Puff and they would be gone.
Just little piles of ash on the floor that the geeky presenter has to come and clean up with a little dust pan and brush.
What's his name?
It'll come to me.

Apparently one of the best ways to fix your mobile phone, should it get wet, is to use a vacuum cleaner to suck the moisture out.
I must remember to carry a fucking Dyson around with me next time it looks like rain.

Have you ever mixed up two products by mistake, with disastrous results?
I was up very early this morning, quarter to bastard five to be precise, and was in the bathroom.
I went to have a shave, but got the shaving gel mixed up with the new style toothpaste I just bought and smeared minty paste all over my face.
Not content with that, I went downstairs and made a cup of coffee, putting two spoons of bicarbonate of soda in instead of sugar.

Evan Davies.

The funny thing is, I don't take sugar.

Still, despite all that, I still managed to drive 520 miles in the pouring rain with the indicators on all the way instead of the windscreen wipers.

I think all five Dragons should present Blue Peter, with Evan Davis playing the theme tune on a comb and tissue combo.

I'm going to try and find a new box to live in.
This ones got a bit wet in the rain.

No comments:

Post a Comment