Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Wednesday 20th April 2011

Home again, home again, jiggidy jig.

An uneventful journey home tonight, so nothing much to tell there really. There were no running bird monster type things committing hari kari on my car bonnet, still not sure what it was. I have a collection of blackish brown feathers stuck to my car and a big yellowy brown patch on my registration plate. What sort of animal / bird / monster thing has yellowy brown innards? The same sort of colour as a babies shit when it does those really stinking nappy fillers. I suppose I'll never know now

I hear Queenie and Phil are meeting Michael and Carole tomorrow. Having lunch, or dinner or something, in Windsor. First time they will have met. Leaving it a bit late aren't they? You would have thought they would have made the effort a bit earlier, got their people to speak with their people and all that jazz. Still, better late than never I suppose.

And how come she is (or soon to be used to be) called Kate when her name is Catherine. Surely she should be called Cate? And I see that the BBC have had a meeting and have decided that she should be called Catherine from now on. Not Kate, or Cate, or even Kathryn, but Catherine.
Best of luck to them, but I'm working on the 29th I'm afraid so I'll have to send my regrets.
It'll never last anyhoo.

I'm sure there was something else I was gonna say, I'll have a think whilst I eat my Lemon Meringue Pie and Ice Cream.

Somebody wrote the following on Farcebook earlier today, yes it was you Chris [this'll be a test to see if you read this!!!], and the scary thing about it is how much of it I can actually remember.

"If you were raised on home cooking, your cot was covered with Lead Base paint, rode a bike with no helmet on gravel roads, your parents had no child proof lids or seat belts in cars, U got a smack when U misbehaved, had 3 TV channels that U got up 2 change, school always started w/the Lord's Prayer & the national anthem & stores were closed Sunday, U drank water out of a hose and YOU STILL TURNED OUT OK. Repost"

Now I don't think of myslef as all that old, fuck me I'm not all that old, so maybe these things happened not so long ago. Maybe they happened fairly recently but we just think it was a long time ago. Maybe it's a big conspiracy thing by the Government and they have brainwashed us all. A bit like "The Truman Show" or whatever that Jim Carey film was called. Not 'The Mask' or 'The Cable Guy' or any of the other ones, the one where he lives in a reality TV show. I'm sure Cowell must be in there somewhere.

Ho hum, time for bed, methinks.............

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