Wednesday 9th February 2011

Hump day is nearly over.

And I've only got eleven hours and a bit.

It's only Wednesday and I have already put around £120 worth of petrol in my car.

With tax on petrol currently running at about 99%, this means I have spent very little on the petrol itself, but I am giving more and more money to the Gobblement. I will have to fill up again on Friday so that will be another £60/£70 so I'm looking at spending nearly £2 on fuel and about £384 on tax this week. When you think about it, we spend a hell of a lot of money on the Gobblement, with our generous gifts of taxation. We work our bollocks off (most of us) and get taxed, twice, on our wages. Income tax and National Insurance. Some people, those on a 'K' tax code, pay tax on more than they earn. Then we are taxed on every single thing we buy, with petrol currently running at about 832% and VAT recently increased to 20%. Then, if we inherit anything, we are taxed on that, even though the person who has died has paid two taxes on everything they earned and everything they spent so that means the thing that has been inherited has been taxed four times so far. Should we decide to sell the inheritance then there would be more taxes incurred. The seller would pay a tax and the buyer would pay a tax. As the money the buyer is going to use has already been taxed (twice) then the inherited item is now running at seven times (I think). Think about how much money the Gobblement has just earned from that one item, and how much that one item is now worth? It aint worth too much any more.

Do you remember when the TV stations used to go off at eleven o'clock? When the National Anthem was played and then the test card came on? And there were only three channels. I can remember when Channel 4 started. Now we have about 3 mililion channels and, most of the time, absolute crap. I'm currently watching a programme about estate agents. What a crock of shit.

Me capsaicin crystals haven't arrived yet, but I have had an email from them saying that "due to the high level of demand" they have run out of stock, but should have more in the next week or two. For something that is supposed to be illegal to sell after the end of January this year, they are still doing a good job of advertising it on their website.

Fish anyone???

I bet gypsies don't pay so much tax, they probably have a special gypsy tax. I wonder if any of them pay it? Probably, some of them at least.

I was asked a question the other day, and the question was; "Who would win in a fight, a Lion or a Tiger?" Well, as this is the sort of question that keeps my mind occupied for

hours on end, I thought about it. I eventually came up with the conclusion that a Lion would win, for various reasons. The Lion is bulkier, has a bigger head and is generally harder looking. I was told that neither of them would win as they would never fight because they live on different continents, or somesuch nonsense. Well I live on a different continent to an African, but I've met one or two. The person that asked me has obviously never heard of aeroplanes and holidays. It can't be beyond the wit of a Lion or a Tiger to get on a plane and fly to where the other is? And what about zoos? Zoos have both species, they could nip out of their cages for a bit.
And what with Twatter and Farcebook and all the other t'interweb social website things, it wouldn't be too hard to organise a bloody good flame-up. So I stick by my guns, a Lion would whup the arse of the Tiger, not necessarily with ease, but it would whup it all the same.
I can comfortably say that without fear of ridicule, because can you prove me wrong?

If you are having a Tiger/Lion flame-up any time soon, please let me know.............