Sunday, 27 February 2011

Sunday 27th February 2011

Lasagne, the World's most perfect food.

Garfield said that, not Garfield Sobers, he would have been too busy playing cricket or doing stuff that cricketers do when they're not cricketing which may be eating lasagne, who knows, but the Garfield I am talking about is Garfield. Just Garfield. Don't think he had a surname. Jon did. Presumably. But not Garfield. Or Odie. Don't know what Jon's surname was, but maybe I'll find out before the end of this post. I'll get the reporters onto it. Anyway, I made a lasagne for tea tonight, bloody lovely it was. Wasn't really a lasagne as it had no meat. More like a Quornagne. I'm gonna write a vege-recipe book. A vegipe book. Using a slow cooker.

Slow cooked vegipes.

I was in Tesco earlier and there was some King Prawn and Avocado Sushi rolls on the
shelf. They were in a box. A box on the shelf. Thing was, on the box it said "Do not leave on shelf". Now what puzzled me was: did they mean that the King Prawn and Avocado sushi rolls shouldn't be left on the shelf or that the box that the King Prawn and Avocado sushi rolls were in shouldn't be left on the shelf. If it is the former, then how the fuck are Tesco supposed to sell any? Is it a sort of 'beneath the counter' dodgy deal sort of thing that goes on? Do you have to make contact with some shady character in the car park prior to entering the store to make contact? Maybe it is someone who works at the car wash who is in on it.
If it is the latter, then how did whoever put it on the shelf miss it? It's in big fucking letters on the front of the box just below the bit you have to rip off to display the goods. I could see it as walked briskly past. You can see it in the photograph, even though it's only very wee. Maybe it was someone who can't read. Or maybe someone who can't read English.

Bought some paint today. Big bastard tub of paint. Magnolia emulsion. It was a huge tub,
don't ask me how much was in there, how many litres, cause I don't know. It was big, ok. Well it only cost me a tenner, which was good. I bought some gloss and brushes and rollers and a tray too. It's for the office. I've got furniture coming next week (hopefully) so I have to get it painted. I had to get some filler as well, there were some holes in the wall, just little stuff where nails had been, but a big hole too where one of the kids once hit his head. So I have filled them in and cleaned the skirting board and dado rail and now just need to paint.
I hate painting. I think Liz is a bit pissed off too. The rest of the house needs decorating but I am only doing the office. Well for now anyhoo. You never know, I may get the bug and go the whole hog, do the whole bloody thing, top to bottom.
I once bought a lampshade. Most expensive lampshade I ever bought. It wasn't the lampshade that was dear, it was the fact that after buying the lampshade I then had to decorate the room the lampshade went in. Then the adjoining room had to be done followed swiftly by the rest of the downstairs. Then, of course, the hall, stairs and landing had to be done and in the end the WHOLE FUCKING HOUSE had to be re-decorated. Cost a bastard fortune.

Arbuckle, that's it, Jon Arbuckle.

Anyways, I'm off to cut me hair..............

1 comment:

  1. I went to Tesco too today. Strangest thing - the wife started checking spuds in bags for freshness. Been with her for 20 years now - but that's a new one on me. I just wanted some beer, but she wouldn't be denied.

    Women eh...can't live with em...can't live with em either.

    Bloody mad they are.

    Nice blog mate.