Wednesday, 1 June 2011

Wednesday 1st June 2011

In the Port of Amsterdam.

I was in the town today and I happened to walk past on of the big cheap versions of a
Department Store.
Can't remember the name of it, Hughes or something but that's not the point. In the shop window there were some mattresses for sale. Memory foam mattresses. And these mattresses were in boxes that were not big enough for a mattress, not unless it was rolled up. Now I have never tried to roll up a mattress but I would imagine it to be quite tricky. Unless, of course, the mattress in question was extremely thin and cheap and shite, which I would imagine these were.
What made me wonder though, what really made me wonder, was that if these mattresses were made from memory foam and they were rolled up in a box, how could you use them? Unless you were a cigar. Surely the mattress's memory would kick in every time you tried to flatten them out.

I suppose they could have the memory of a Goldfish, some say only ten seconds long, but then that would be a bit of a shitty
memory mattress in my opinion. The mattress would forget it's position every time you changed position, and if you were a restless sleeper, one who tosses and turns, it would be a complete nightmare. The mattress would not know what to do and would probably go mad.
And then you would wake up in the morning in a really foul mood and possibly stay in a foul mood all day, so I didn't think it was really worth buying.

We've got "Britain's Got Talent" on the tele, deep joy, and there has just been some street dancers on, as there is every year. Now you have to remember that this is BRITAIN's Got Talent and although I may live in a small village in the North of the country (it aint really THAT far North!) I do travel around a lot, but I have never ever seen any street dancers on any street anywhere. Where the fuck are they all?

I must be walking down the wrong streets, anyhoo I'm off to Reading tomorrow, maybe I'll see some there.............

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