Tuesday 21st June 2011

You put your left leg in...

Dysons. They suck. Which is a good thing, I suppose, as they are hoovers after all. Apparently if I said that whilst being in the employ of Mr James Dyson (or whatever his name is) I would get an official warning. Liz brought hers from her old house and has just hoovered dysoned the front room. Every two minutes she was pausing to show me how much shit it had picked up. Which is good, in a way, as it shows it is doing it's job, but it's also pretty gross as it shows that we have had a dirty filthy rank carpet for the past years I have lived here.

Hold on, gotta go check on dinner.

Looking good, wedges are crisping up nicely. Not your shop bought ones, but proper potatoes cut up into wedgy shaped pieces and coated with a secret recipe. I would tell you what was in it, but then I would have to change the name of it from 'My Secret Recipe' to My Recipe' and that would sound shit.
We are have escalopes with the wedges, they are shop bought as I am not sure how to (a)grow quorn, or (b)turn it into escalopes and anyhoo, it's easier just to open a box.

I saw a lorry transporting four phoneboxes along the M62 tonight. Bit extreme for a mobile phone, if you have to carry your mobile phone on the back of a lorry then you may as well just drive to the house of whoever you want to speak with and talk face to face. Unless of course you don't like them and want to leave an abusive message. Then you could write a letter. You wouldn't have the same emotion I suppose, but at least you wouldn't have to drive a truck around.
I wonder if the driver of the truck in question just drives around randomly picking up phoneboxes?

And why are 'Baked Beans' called baked beans? Are they baked? I understand that 'Haricot beans in tomato sauce' doesn't have the same ring, but why not something like 'Harry Beans' or 'Tommy Beans' or something of that ilk? Surely, if they are not baked at some time in the preparation process, they are contravening the Trade Description Act, or whatever it is called now? I dunno, maybe they are and therefore they are not (if you know what I mean).

Anyhoo, gotta go, dinner's ready and then it's back to the revision.............