Wednesday 25th May 2011

Bonny Scotland. What's so freaking bonny about it on a day like this?

I appreciate that some parts of Scotland are very beautiful, even in the rain, but have you noticed that the beautiful places are always devoid of people. There's just countryside, nothing else.

I was in London the other week. As regular visitors will know, I hate London. But there I was, driving between Croydon and Mile End Road (E1), and I passed a sign advertising a "Cemetery Open Day".
What the fuck is that all about? Is it a day when you can go to the cemetery and book your own plot? Maybe even try it out? Or maybe just go for a look around, a browse.

Went to a wedding 'do' last weekend in Swansea. Well I say it was in Swansea but what I really mean is that the hotel we stayed in was in Swansea because I booked it there. And the reason I booked a hotel in Swansea was because I was told the wedding do was in Swansea. It turned out that the 'do' was on the Gower road and was about fifteen miles outside of Swansea. It was in the middle of nowhere, right out in the sticks, but not a place you could get lost in as it only had one road. Admittedly the one road that was there was full of sheep and cows and stuff, well mostly sheep but this was Wales after all.

Still the 'do' was good. Lots of people taking lots of drink. Some more than others, and you all know who you are.

Drove an Aston Martin around the Stow Circuit at Silverstone. That was pretty damn good, but friggin hard work. Have you ever tried driving a high performance car around a track at high speed without crashing? It aint fucking easy, and I ended up going not very fast.

Fuck me slowly, accelerate, brake, change gear. But do none of the aforementioned whilst turning so do it all before you turn. But not until the braking point. Which is about a second away from the turning point. No bastard wonder I was in the wrong gear most of the time.

Good fun though, and the noise..... The noise was something else.
There were Ferraris, Lambos, Audi R8s and a couple of Nissan playstation type things on the track, but none so good as the Aston Martins.
That's not my opinion. That's fucking fact, baby.............