Monday, 6 September 2010

Monday 6th September 2010

Bingo Shmingo.

Got a broadband wifi thing delivered today.
Up til now I've had to make do with my phone, and it's a very nice phone and all with swype text and everything, but it ain't a computer.
So I get a wifi broadband thing and it was with the neighbours when I get home from work.
The kettle goes on, the box gets unwrapped and I'm like a kid at Christmas.
It's all set up and I'm online, then the missus gets home and I'm back on me phone and she's playing bingo.
I ask you.

Still, the swype text on me phone petty cool.
God knows how it works, I just slide my finger over the screen and it puts the words in the box.
There is either a very small person inside my phone or a camera trained on my every move and an extremely fast typist typing as I swype away.
I can't think what else it could be, but I can't decide which one it is as they both sound pretty plausible.

If someone invented an engine that ran on water, it wouldn't be as good an idea as they, or you, might think.
Yeah it would be as cheap as chips, well cheaper seeing the fucking price of chips these days; over ten bastard quid for two fish and frigging chips, but what would happen in the summer?
When we all have a hosepipe ban you wouldn't be able to fill up your car.
Unless you used a bucket but then you would spill most of it.
Water touts would make a killing.
And you wouldn't be able to sell water fueled cars in places like Africa, it just wouldn't be right.

Thinking about it, in places where water is extremely rare, places where drinking water is scarce and small children have to walk miles with jugs on their heads, why don't we just make some?
It can't be that hard can it?
Water is just made up of Hydrogen and Oxygen.
Why not throw some of this in the air and let it rain.

Imagine the rainbows.

Butter is no good on a burn and salted butter burns.
If you put salted butter on a burn would they cancel each other out?
Would the salt burn thus rendering your burning skin superfluous?
They say two wrongs don't make a right, even if three lefts do, but do two negatives make a positive or do opposites attract chalk and cheese?

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